Chicken, O Chicken

The five basic precepts at the core of Buddhist practice are no killing, no stealing, no lying, no sexual misconduct, and no intoxicants. Originally, the Buddha taught only the first four of these precepts. Chicken, O Chicken is an explanation of why the fifth, no intoxicants, was added.

He took the five precepts, with a pure and upright mind
But his mind grew sloppy with the passage of time
Until one day he asked himself, “What’s the reason behind
This uptight regulation against a little wine

Staring at a bottle of primo vino red
He popped the cork, took a sip, the fire rose to his head
Looking for some hors d’oeuvres to send that grape juice down
When along come a chicken, a pecking at the ground

Chicken, O chicken, oh how you lost your head
And ended up a Colonel Sanders’ takeout treat instead
Suddenly he heard a knocking as he staggered to the door
‘Twas the neighbor lady asking, “Did my chicken come through your yard?”

Her beauty lit the alcohol burning in his mind
“No, I didn’t see no chicken come this way,” he lied
“But you’re not bad yourself,” he said, as he locked the door
And in his drunken stupor…

Sad story, now he burns alive
Because he broke one precept, he blew it on all five
Sad story, now he burns in hell
And when he will get out, no human tongue can tell

So take care, all you cultivators of the Way
Don’t think because it’s a little thing you can write the rules your way
Yama’s got your number; you’re listed in his files
And if you’re off by a hair to start with, you’re gonna miss it by a million miles

Chicken, O chicken, oh how you lost your head
And ended up a Colonel Sanders takeout treat instead
Sad story, now he burns in hell
And when he will get out, no human tongue can tell